Thursday, February 21, 2013

It Takes a Village

So raising children is hard work. It's exhausting, right? Thankfully, God sends us resources and people to encourage us and spur us on. It is a battle to raise children in this chaotic world.  My best friend recently sent me a transcript from a Family Life broadcast about discipline in 2-4 year olds that is fantastic. I love when my friends send me stuff like this, it reminds me that there are others out there who are praying for strength to love their kiddos enough to grow as parents and do the best thing which is usually the hardest thing. Because it is a journey; Josh and I are perpetually reevaluating our parenting techniques and what works best with each child, they are so different! So Sarah sending me this reminded me of all the parenting resources I've cataloged over the past few years, and I wanted to share some of them. God gives us community to exhort one another towards godliness, to love each other, and pray for one another when things inevitably don't go as planned:-). 

Discipline 2-4 year olds: Transcript/Audio from the Family Life radio broadcast Sarah sent me. So much good advice. Part 2 is here: Discipline 2-4 year olds-Part 2

Children are a Blessing: Lots of succint, applicable advice here. Josh found this, summarizes a lot of what we've read in parenting books. My favorite part is the guy's first point, children are a blessing. How often have I seen my children as a burden or as impeding on what I want?? Get your eyes off of yourself, Smeader!

10 Ways to Love Your Kids: Great reminders.

So the above links have some practical parenting techniques, and I hope they don't overwhelm you. I know I get overwhelmed when I think about discipline. So here is some encouragement! A quote from the Discipline 2-4 year olds link from Dennis Rainey:

"You know, after hearing this many principles and stories and all that, it's easy 
to get something like parenting down to a formula, or an "A + B =C" type of approach.  I just want to encourage you that, don't remove God from the equation.  Because he has all kinds of surprises that you're going to discover as you raise your family.  Some of what's going to happen with your children is going to help you grow up. 

We mistakenly thought God gave us six to raise them; He gave us six to finish the
process of growing us up.  It's interesting how many times you can observe behavior in your children, that's a real reflection back of your own devious heart.  What I'd just encourage you to do is keep following Christ, and don't lose your first love for him in growing as a follower of Christ. 

Because, it's your relationship with Him, that's going to enable you to stay ahead of your kids. Because he knows where they're headed; he knows what they're dealing with.  He does feel sorry for us at times, as we raise our family.  He will help you catch them, when they're doing something wrong and when they're doing something right.  You need to celebrate the positive, and we've talked about what you do with the negative, but in all of those things, have courage that you can do the right thing and finish the course, and raise the next generation who are going to take our places."

So from that...here are links to remind us who ultimately is in control:-):

Behavior vs. Heart Change: This is NOT to hate on homeschooling. Not at all. This article simply encourages all of us, home school/public school/private school, to check our hearts that we don't think our particular "brand" of parenting is the best. Lots of good reminders to lean on and press into God first in all decisions and not judge others with their particular choice.

My Favorite: This is my favorite. She just nailed it. We are so dependent on His mercy.

Trust In His Love: God can restore brokenness. That's what He does, that's who He is. So remember, when you fail, he offers grace. As a parent, this is a truth I have to remember constantly.

Overall, I remember in a women's bible study once, a woman who had had some struggles with her teenage son saying she held on to this verse through it all - 1 Peter 4:8 Above all, love each other deeply, for love covers a multitude of sins.  That just struck me. I need to LOVE my children. Well what is love? Well first God is love (1 John 4:16).  And then the beautiful definition from 1 Corinthians 13 that we use so much in the marriage relationship, but definitely translates into the parent/child relationship - Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love never fails. What a great reminder of how to love on our babies as they grow and most importantly to draw from the powerful love offered to us in Jesus Christ.  

If you have any good parenting resources, please share! Would love to hear from you, we're in this together!! Let's fail together, pray for one another, quit judging each other, and realize that we have the same goal if you're a believer - children who love jesus first and foremost, right?? 


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